Pictures worth a thousand words....

This time last year I was starting infertility meds and worried that I would never get pregnant again. This year, I am soaking up the joys of having a smiley chunky monkey in my life. All the glory goes to God. Jackson had a rough started from the very beginning. This journey hasn't been without tears, fears, and lots of worry. But, by the grace of God....Jackson is a smiley, refluxing, projectile spitting up, loving baby!

Motherhood

This is my "mother's bracelet". It is one of my most prized possessions. I wear this, with pride, daily. It has the names of all my children and their birthstones on it. You may notice that there are more birthstones than names. Yes, your math is correct....one of our children went to heaven before we had a name for them. But, they are honored with the birthstone of the month they were due in.

My bracelet is a constant reminder of why my job is so important. Though it lacks in the financial pay department and it's vacation policy stinks, it's benefits are overwhelming. However, sometimes I get tired. And sometimes I get overwhelmed with life. And sometimes, I forget what all I have to be thankful for.

I look down at my bracelet and remember.

Maddie, Jackson and Sam.

Blue birthstone for precious baby waiting me in heaven.

That is what I have to be thankful for. No matter the ups and downs. No matter the tears and smiles. No matter the laundry and crunched cereal under foot. No matter how much projectile spit up lands in my basket of clean clothes.....Those children. My babies is why I am thankful and so lucky.

Motherhood allows me to be a kid. Seriously, only a mother can actually climb and play in the play structures at the park and not look like a bloomin' idiot. Oh wait, what is that you say? I do look like a bloomin' idiot. Probably. Let me rephrase....only motherhood allows me to NOT care that I look like a bloomin' idiot while playing with my kids.

Only motherhood allows for bedtime books that bring back fond memories of years past by. Little House on the Prairie, anyone? Ramona Quimbly?

Only motherhood allows for sweet kisses (that certain boys always wipe off) and precious snuggles (that sometimes leave you with the perfume of spit up lingering behind).

Only motherhood allows me to be the greatest thing EVER in the eyes of my 3 darlin's. All I have to do is pop some popcorn and presto....my "cool" status has returned.

Motherhood allows me to swell with pride at even the smallest accomplishments. Maddie learning how to read and actually reading a book to Sam and Jackson. Sam being such a sweet big brother to Jackson and actually getting the burp cloth to wipe the spit up off of him without gagging. Jackson's sweet smiles and coos that follow a no nap day when I am plum worn out.

With motherhood comes a certain responsibility. Little one's egos and self esteem are so fragile. They look to me for encouragement and excitement for their projects. And I have to be so careful to give each project- be it a painting of a "funny lookin' shark" done for Sam's fall picture or a carefully crafted long bragged about piece of pottery- the praise that is sought after. Even when the piece of pottery comes home looking like.....well.....something out of Jackson's diaper.

Being a mother means even proudly displaying pottery that reminds you of "business" that you wipe up day in and day out. So, next time you are in my house....look for my newest decoration that I get to inwardly chuckle at when things are going awry.

Being a mother means getting to love on these precious little ones........

Note: Maddie is also my precious little one, but she was at school when I took these pictures. Don't want you to think that her pottery made me not want to take her picture :)

Happy 2 Month Birthday, Jackson

Jackson turned 2 months on May 5th. At his doctor's appointment he weighted in at a whoppin' 13lbs 15oz and was 25 inches long. If you remember he was 7lbs 15oz and 21inches at birth. Quite a bit of growth in 2 months. He is trying hard to follow in big brother Sam's growth footsteps.

In true Jackson style, we landed back at Children's. Might as well purchase us a parking spot it seems. He had an upper GI study done due to the spitting up through his nose and getting choked....following after his sister in that respect. The study came back that all the bodily structures are in the right place and he isn't aspirating when he eats or when he spits up. Yeah for that....however, we still have to deal with the choking. Always somethin' in the house, I tell ya!

Jackson is now (and has been for about 2 weeks) wearing size 3-6 month clothing and a size 2 diaper. I cried when I put up his newborn and 0-3 month clothes. It is so sad that he is already such a "big boy".

He was sleeping 7-9 hours a night, but in the past few nights has been getting up again to eat. I do believe we are going through yet another growth spurt. Yikes, hope he doesn't go up another clothing size on me!

And Life Goes On.....

I have never in my life (emphasis on the word never and life....that's the State Road way of saying it) seen so much laundry caused by someone so small. My life seemed to revolve around the washer and dryer before Jackson entered the picture. Now, I think I spend more time folding clothes, putting up clothes, and washing clothes than any normal person should. Then again, I never claimed to be normal did I?

Hard to believe that tomorrow J will be 2 months old. Seriously he should be walking and talking by now. It has been the longest most stressful 2 months of my life. Seems 'bout right seeing that his pregnancy was the longest pregnancy EVER. I was pregnant for about 10 years, right? This little sweet boy is bent on causing me an ulcer....wait a minute already had one of those.

He seems all sweet and innocent doesn't he? Hum....wondering what he is plotting next? Already pulled the ER visit, surgery and hospital stay on us. Getting choked while spitting up through his nose? Yep. Getting choked to the point of not being able to breathe? Check! Completely drenching the sweet friend who wanted to hold him at MOPS? Check, Check.

As long as he doesn't convince his brother Sam to do something like run a temp of 103 on a day when I had to teach book club at Maddie's school.....oh wait, that happened too. Wade had to work from home that day so that Sam could go to the doctor at the same time Jackson and I taught book club. I'm good at juggling things, but even I haven't figured out how to be 2 places at once.

Huh, what is all this talk about me causing trouble, Mama? Look at me, how could I do anything like that?

Ha, Ha....got 'em all fooled don't I? Just when things are starting to settle down.....that's when I like to work my magic and get everyone excited again. Found out that spitting up through your nose and choking in the middle of the night lands you right in bed on Mama. And that, my friends, is where the best sleeping EVER occurs....all part of my master plan.

Sam and Jackson are going to make the perfect partners on crime. I truly believe from the bottom of my heart that Sam was given to me to make me laugh. If I only had the guts to share the stories about Sam lately on this blog. I can't bring myself to do it for fear of utter embarrassment when he is older. Let's just say it revolves around his curiosity with my pump.

However, I can share that his new song of choice to sing at school is "Hard Day's Night." Yep, nothing like your 4 year old belting out, while "juking" to, Beetles' songs at his CHURCH preschool. While I'm at it, I can share that his teachers are so amused by his playing is air "ma-tar" during music they have to tell me about it.

While Sam is my stand up comedian, Maddie is my princess (read DRAMA queen). Everything that happens, be it having to get up for school or not knowing a word while reading, is the most horrible thing ever and needs lots of tears to go with it. She is, however, WONDERFUL with Jackson. She is so sweet to him and is a huge help. I can't quite convince her to change a diaper yet and the sight of his spit up sends her running...

It is a crazy life with 3 living in the thawed by still chilly tundra, but I wouldn't change a thing. I am truly blessed to have these three crazy nuts in my life. Even though Jackson has only been a part of the family for 2 months, he fits in so well that is seems like he has been here all along. Now if I can only find out how to rid my hair of spit up smell before my meeting tonight life would be perfect :)